Model answers

🏅Model GCSE Essay on the Feud in Romeo and Juliet

If you’re teaching or studying Shakespeare’s ‘Romeo and Juliet’, you’ll know that essays about the family feud often hover around a Grade 4, 5 or 6—what examiners might call ‘middling’ or ‘competent’ responses. But with a few targeted improvements, these essays can be transformed into top-grade responses. I’ve updated one of my most popular blog posts to show exactly how to do this, paragraph by paragraph, with comments, grade 9 tips, and clear marking guidance for teachers and pupils alike. The key is to move beyond surface-level understanding and begin thinking like a literary analyst. That means really digging into Shakespeare’s language (AO2), showing a secure knowledge of the play and its themes (AO1), and crucially, thinking about why Shakespeare wrote what he did, and how his audience might have reacted (AO3). This is where the 5Ws strategy—Who, What, Where, When, Why—comes in. For example, instead of simply quoting the Prologue’s “ancient grudge” to describe the feud, a top-grade response will explore the word “ancient” in more depth. What does it suggest about tradition, time, and decay? What kind of audience would Shakespeare have been writing for, and why might he start with such a phrase? A Grade 9 student doesn’t just spot a quote—they zoom in on the language, explain the technique being used, and link it to Shakespeare’s bigger message about love, hate, and fate. I’ve used a visual symbol system in the new version of this post to make each part of the answer easier to teach and understand. A pencil icon stands for thoughtful analysis, a book and quill symbol represents literary and historical context, and a checkmark indicates where a pupil is showing Grade 8–9 thinking. I’ve also added a quiet but clear visual: a student figure at the centre of the learning, reminding us this is about developing real, mindful confidence—not just ticking boxes. This new breakdown works well for teachers modelling essays in class, for pupils revising independently, and for tutors looking for a clear teaching sequence. And if you’re looking for more structured support, I’d recommend my edition of the play, Romeo and Juliet: The Complete Play with Integrated Study Notes and Smart Translation—ideal for exploring language, structure and context in one place. For teachers, The Mindful English Teacher includes ideas for making literary analysis more inclusive, reflective, and emotionally aware. You can view the updated post and download the image resources now at francisgilbert.co.uk, or find the essay thread pinned to my socials. Let me know how you use it, and feel free to tag me with examples of Grade 9 insights from your own pupils!