Teacher’s comments on two Romeo and Juliet essays on hatred

11 June 2009

 

Important note

 

TEACHER COMMENTS ARE IN CAPITALS.

Pupils’ work are in lower case.

Essay 1

 

 

‘This play is as much about hate, as it is about love.’ Analyse how the theme of hatred is explored in Shakespeare’s play, discussing how it is represented in the language of the play and could be presented dramatically.

 

   My only love sprung from my only hate!
Too early seen unknown, and known too late!

 

My life were better ended by their hate,
Than death prorogued, wanting of thy love.
 

 

Romeo realises that Juliet’s love is much more important to him than the hatred between the two families.

 

 

Romeo and Juliet is a play. A DRAMATISATION OF AN AMAZING LOVE BETWEEN TWO TEENAGERS. It’s famous for being a tragic love story. DELETE THIS: This is Shakespeare’s portray of a typical tragedy. It’s about some serious topics involving love and death, a sad and emotional story. The two main characters die at the end as a result of hatred OF WHAT?.

 

 

There are two rich, powerful families in the play, the Montagues and the Capulets. They’re in the middle of a TERRIBLE feud, a quarrel that has lasted years. IT IS AN “ANCIENT GRUDGE”, WE NEVER LEARN THE REASON FOR IT, WHY?.

 

Shakespeare opens the play by showing us two servants from the Capulet family talking about raping Montague women. He creates  an atmosphere of hate with this quote: ‘I will be cruel with the maids – I will cut off their heads.’ ANALYSE!!! DISCUSS THE CONTEXT OF THE QUOTE: Shakespeare creates a real sense of threat and hatred immediately by having two servant joking about raping the Montague women. On stage, this scene could be presented very dramatically with the two servants behaving like yobs.

 

 

The first scene of the play shows the magnitude of the feud, when the servants from both families meet in the street and a fight breaks out. Tybalt, Juliet’s cousin says how much he hates Montagues

“What drawn and talk of pence?

I hate the word, as I hate hell, all Montague and thee.”

EXPLAIN WHY THIS QUOTE IS SO DRAMATIC, ANALYSE IT!

SHAKESPEARE PRESENTS THE FEUD AS SOMETHING WHICH IS “COOL”. TYBALT NOTICES THAT BENEVOLIO, EVEN THOUGH HE’S TALKING ABOUT PEACE HAS “DRAWN” HIS SWORD. TYBALT HATES THE WORD “PEACE” BECAUSE HE LOVES FIGHTING. THUS WE SEE SHAKESPEARE PRESENTING THE FEUD AS SOMETHING THAT IS EXCITING AND THRILLING.

 

Shakespeare has shown right from the start of the play that the feud is serious, it is causing deaths and mayhem even though Romeo and Juliet fall in love, they are taking a big risk. TALK ABOUT THE FIRST MEETING??

 

 

The optimism and romance of Romeo and Juliet livened the play up, O she doth teach the torches to burn bright” a far cry from the hate that causes so much misery. Love, lies and hate are the recipe for disaster in this play – and resulting in two tragic unnecessary deaths. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Juliet warns Romeo against her own family “If they do see thee, will murder thee”. ANALYSE”! USE THE FIVE WS: WHEN, WHERE, WHY?

 

Hate is shown in every part of the story, the feud in inescapable throughout, although love is represented between Romeo and Juliet, the hate is represented dramatically and extremely powerful in the play. The death of Romeo and Juliet puts a conclusion to the hatred between the two families. FIND A QUOTE AND ANALYSE

 

 

 

There are moments of comedy and optimism in the story, Juliet’s nurse who has really looked after her is a light hearted character, who was fond of Juliet and showed this by the way she talked about her “Now by maidenhood – at twelve year old – I bade her com. What lamb! What lady Bird! God Forbid! Where this girl? What Juliet!” these moments lessoned the dramatic feel to enable the audience to have some respite from the sadness which was needed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Essay 2

 

CORRECTIONS: Many people presume this play is predictable, unfulfilling WRONG WORD and has one theme running throughout namely love. This is not the case. Hatred is more often than not used subtly WHAT DOES THIS MEAN? but is somewhat overshadowed by the passion and emotions of love. THERE SHOULD BE A NEW PARAGRAPH AND NEW SENTENCE HERE when Romeo and Juliet first see each other at Capulet’s ball. Romeo “O speak again bright angel for thou art as glorious to this night, being o’er my head, As is a winged messenger of heaven.” YOU MUST QUOTE THE VERSE PROPERLY — TEN SYLLABLES PER LINE — AND COMMENT UPON THE CONTEXT, THE IMPACT, THE RHYTHM OF THE LINE

 

 

Shakespeare’s varied use of English terms cleverly contrasts both themes of hatred and love to build up an expected climax which features the deaths of Romeo and Juliet and peace between the feuding families. THIS IS MORE LIKE A CONCLUSION

 

This fight features prejudice and hatred ,” Tybalt: As I hate hell, all Montagues and thee. Have at thee coward”.  QUOTE PROPERLY AND COMMENT UPON THE CONTEXT, THE EFFECT OF THE VERSE, HOW IT MIGHT BE DRAMATISED

 

“Canker’d with peace to part your canker’d hate,If you ever disturb our streets again” creates an undertone of hate that contrasts with the predominant theme of love WHY? HOW?

 

 

If I were staging the scene I would have the spotlight picking out Benvolio against a white background to symbolise his innocence. He would be huddled in a corner whilst in contrast Tybalt would be a muscular man with a red light from behind portraying his patronising, vile personality. The audience should take pity on Benvolio as whilst trying to stop the fight Tybalt arrived and attacked  him viciously. This is a striking example of undeserved hatred.  “I do but keep the peace. Put up thy sword, or manage it to part these men with me”. GOOD COMMENTS UPON THE DRAMATISATION OF THE SCENE, BUT YOU DO NEED TO QUOTE FIRST AND THEN ANALYSE

 

Another example TALK ABOUT HOW SHAKESPEARE DEVELOPS THE THEME OF HATRED FROM THE BEGINNING OF THE PLAY TO THE POINT WHERE THERE IS A FIGHT WITH TERRIBLE CONSEQUENCES of a scene of unjustified hatred is the death of Mercutio caused by Tybalt. ” Tybalt you rat -catcher, will you walk?” . Saying this Mercutio provokes the easily provoked Tybalt but the cause I think of his death is the appearance of a Montague named Romeo who was Tybalt’s real target at the ball in an earlier scene .The comments of the jealous Mercutio towards Tybalt are harsh “O calm, dishonourable, vile submission!’ I believe that the calm placid love-sick figure of Romeo provokes Tybalt into lashing out YOU MUST COMMENT UPON THE CONTEXT HERE…

 

 

unjustly killing Mercutio. IS IT UNJUST? HASN’T MERCUTIO BEEN PRESENTED BY SHAKESPEARE AS STIRRING UP THE FIGHT POINTLESSLY?

 

Shakespeare’s  use of blank verse spoken by the nobility, ‘Men’s eyes were made to look and gaze’ and prose spoken by the lower class helps the audience to understand each character’s personality and where they fit in eg Tybalt’s way of speaking is arrogant and threatening “Fetch my rapier boy. What dares the slave come hither,covered with an antic face “,  COMMENT UPON THE VERSE THROUGHOUT? SHOULDN’T THIS SECTION BE WITH THE SECTION WHERE ROMEO FIRST SEES JULIET?

 

The climax increases through each scene as the theme of hatred becomes more evident. THIS DOESN’T FULLY MAKE SENSE..

 

YOU HAVE THE POTENTIAL TO WRITE A GREAT ESSAY HERE, BUT YOU MUST IMPROVE THE ORGANISATION OF YOUR ESSAY. I WOULD SUGGEST THESE SECTIONS:

 

1. INTRODUCTION

2, A DISCUSSION OF THE FIRST SCENE WHERE SHAKESPEARE INTRODUCES THE THEME OF HATRED, SHOWING US HOW HATRED HAS AFFECTED BOTH FAMILIES RIGHT FROM THE SERVANTS TO THE ELDERLY MEN.

3. THE PARTY SCENE. THE LOVE BETWEEN ROMEO AND JULIET IS IN STARK CONTRAST TO THE HATRED SHOWN BY TYBALT.

4. THE SCENE WHERE TYBALT KILLS MERCUTIO AND ROMEO KILLS TYBALT. THIS IS THE REAL TURNING POINT IN THE PLAY. IF ROMEO HADN’T BEEN SO OVERWHELMED BY HATRED THEN THE TRAGEDY WOULD NOT HAVE HAPPENED. SHAKESPEARE IS SHOWING US THE TERRIBLE CONSEQUENCES OF BLIND HATRED.

Share and Enjoy:

1 comment

  1. this helped a lot, i have exam tommarow and i have to write an essay about how shakespeare present love between romeo and juliet. i have to write 2 paragraph about sonnet, can somebody tell me what i have to write on that 2 sonnet paragraph please………… hplease help

    from Rose

your comment

Students